It was a cold, windy run. There was no sun, and there wasn’t much fun to be had outside, other than roughhousing with my dog, Sarge. So I tucked him in his yard, gave him a bone, and hurried inside to take a nice, hot bubble bath. And that’s when it happened. I was lying back, relaxing and jabbering happily away on my old reliable Sanyo Taho flip cell phone, when she just slipped from my hand and plunged through the deep white suds.
And just like that, she was gone.
I hope it was an accident, though I’m not quite sure. I mean, she was old and I might have had some unspoken, unresolved issues going on. I know I could have reached in to help her, but for whatever reason, I just let her drown. I realize that I should feel some remorse—after all, she had served me well for many years. And I respect loyalty. But here’s the truth, dear old Sanyo Taho flip cell phone: I will remember you for as long as I remember a passing cloud.
And not only that, Sanyo Taho flip cell phone, but it took me just two days to find a new sweetheart: a sleek and sexy iPhone 4S, whom I can have real conversations with. Someone who knows how to do so much more for me than just show the stupid time.
So good-bye, Sanyo Taho flip cell phone. Love is harsh and sometimes ends in sorrow. I’m glad you drowned. If you’re lucky, maybe some part of you will be recycled and will live again.